In the elevator

Person to other person:

I live 10 minutes from work with the bike. That’s nice, no traffic. But today, like many other days, I came with the car.

Just wanted to share silly thing I heard.

Heard on the job

manager: can you do this in Java?

Team: Can you tell us some more about it?

manager: Yes but estimations and such will not work since it is fixed price and fixed scope. So it can not be done with scrum.

Team: Well you know …. manager, you

Image from

Stuff they say.

Project manager to a team member of another project:

Agility is the most important thing. Often it are small questions, but they require immediate attention for the project to be able to proceed.

By which he means. If I need you, drop everything you are doing in your team for that other customers and forget about your sprint commitments